Luke Rollason: The showbiz secrets of a Disney star
REVEALED!
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REVEALED! 〰️
Image: Dylan Woodley
Edinburgh Fringe 2024 is here! And so is our annual features series. This year, it’s all about REVELATIONS: the gossip, the mysteries, the spies and the moles. Because everyone knows you can’t keep a secret at Edinburgh Fringe…
Despite shooting to fame as a shapeshifting cat-man, Luke Rollason is back at Edinburgh Fringe with his new show Luke Rollason, Luke Rollason, Let Down Your Hair. He’s risking it all for us, sharing the juiciest secrets he’s gleaned from his access to the celeb life.
By Luke Rollason
After taking a hiatus to become demi-famous (famous enough I’m accused of being a catfish on dating apps, not famous enough for meaningful career development) I’m returning to the Edinburgh Fringe – my sanctuary from the heady winds of fame.
After all, where else can you find yourself surrounded by the most down-to-earth, realistic and secure creatives in the world? Goodbye, the miasma of toxic comparison and BAFTA seat allocation envy (sure, I was two rows behind Brian Cox, but could I not have been on his lap?)
No, the Edinburgh Fringe is the place where everyone knows who they are and what they are worth without needing to be force-fed validation like they’re getting the Fois Gras treatment.
Having turned my back on the glitz and glamour of the screen (but a back turn that could easily turn into a 360-degree spin, casting directors!) I can finally lift the lid on what really goes on in the TV industry, at least during the short short time that I was given a glimpse at it over someone else’s shoulder.
It’s well known that on set, you can ask for any kind of food and they have to make it for you. I once asked for a lobster omelette. That’s not an omelette with lobster in it. That’s an omelette made from lobster eggs. It’s not that different from Fringe really – in Edinburgh, thanks to all the food trucks clogging valuable walking space, you can take your pick of almost any cuisine as long as its chips.
It’s true, all actors do sleep with each other, but only in piles of three or four. There are usually giant hammocks constructed for this purpose, like flaccid trampolines. This isn’t unlike most sleeping arrangements at the Edinburgh Fringe, although at the Fringe no one is getting any sleep.
Every year at the Fringe, one act is catapulted to fame and is soon seen acting, writing and chatshowing on screens everywhere. The same is true of the TV industry, but in reverse. Every year, one highly successful onscreen talent is forced to go and perform standup at the Fringe. Remember when Jeremy Paxman did a Fringe show? His number came up. It’s a one in, one out policy. We lost Paxman so we could have Phoebe Waller-Bridge.
In TV, all anyone can talk about is awards. Thankfully, this is one arena where the Edinburgh Fringe is nothing like the biz. Most years, we forget that there are any awards at all, let alone that anyone could win one. Except for the poster award, which is my own personal Moby Dick (it will be my death).
Claire Balding is straight.
So, that’s the gossip. Now you know what you’re not missing out on. So, if I were you, I wouldn’t invite any of those “industry” fakers to your show anyway. You’ll only come crawling back, begging LMAOnaise to bite the hand that once fed you x x x
Luke Rollason, Luke Rollason, Let Down Your Hair runs at Pleasance Dome (10 Dome) from Jul 31-Aug 25th (except 13th). Tickets here
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