Butt vacuums and zero gravity: At the Space Fringe with Zoe Brownstone

Fantasy Fringe

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Fantasy Fringe 〰️

We’re excited about the Edinburgh Fringe, but it’s clear it needs to change. A lot of people have a lot of ideas, but nothing has really happened yet. So we decided to ask the comedians themselves: in your fantasy, what would the Fringe look like? It might have been a mistake.

So, the Fringe is in Space now. Zoe Brownstone has taken a show up into the stars because that’s what everyone is doing. Join her in the Moon Room for an hour of jokes about the climate crisis and the end of the world, because what is funnier than impending doom?

Stardate: 08.23

Well, today was a total bust. I shouldn’t say total. But It feels like a waste. It probably wasn’t in reality, but honestly I’m feeling, well, I’m feeling a bit aimless here! And no it’s not the lack of solid food or gravity, I’m not being precious. If anything I would say the work has less gravity than I do. No truthfully it's the general vibe. God I sound like such a gen z. But really, you do all this nerd work; learn quantum physics, master the simulator after hundreds of attempts, read all those boring books about rockets, then you finally get up here and…. The writing is just, well, ok?! I mean jeez you think the other acts would have tested some of their material before lift off. It feels like this is the rehearsal for the show, not the show itself! And I know Fringe is a sort of work in progress blah blah blah but come on people! We’re in friggin space, did you think we wouldn’t need punchlines up here?!

Some of these other comics, it feels like they’re just rocket scientists dabbling in stand up when really it should be the other way around!! I’m not saying I’m Joan Armstrong Rivers over here but I toured for a couple months before coming up here, I did my previews, got reviewed, hell I even landed a decent shout out in “Space LOLs Monthly”. And yes I know it’s not everyone’s goal to land an agent or a prolonged space mission from the festival but I feel like I’m the only space monkey up here with an actual goal! Everyone else is just floating around high on O2!

And don’t get me started on the toilet humor, like hello we get it you use a vacuum to poop, big whoop so does my grandad. I guess I just imagined a galaxy far far away from the same old dick jokes I heard back home. I fantasized about meeting some cool, fun, alien formed beings who were different who saw things from a perspective that’s totally new! I dunno, maybe I’m being too negative? Maybe I’m the problem! Was it too bold to come up with an hour of zero gravity period jokes? Well good thing I didn’t do that, ha! Good thing I stuck to my guns and talked about what I always talk about: the climate crisis and the end of the world. Because nothing is funnier than impending doom (now that we have accessible space travel obviously).

Finally, a crowd that can really actually see the whole picture (I’m staring at her now actually, the sun’s about to rise over East Africa and if I squint really hard I can almost imagine the whole planet’s not on fire). I think what frustrates me most is the cost of this whole thing. It was sold to me as a real career opportunity but now that I’m here, well let’s just say accommodation is the least of my expenses for once! Travel alone set me back about a year's worth of income, hopefully that grant I applied for will come through. I still think the “Jews in Space Bursary Fund” is a bit of a racy title but hey I’ll take whatever I can get!

Alright well, that’s enough moaning from me, gotta get ready for my show over in the Moon Room (idiotic name for a room that doesn’t even rotate around the moon during my set!). Stop, stop it! Be grateful for the opportunity, just to be here is wonderful, honestly. And hell if it gets me an agent or even a meeting, I’ll be grateful. I’ll even forgive the butt vacuums and strawberry mush they call ice cream.

Zoe Brownstone is sharing an hour at the Edinburgh Fringe with Dominic McGovern. Tied for Second runs at Just The Tonic Nucleus from August 3-27th, 4:30pm. Tickets here.

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